As a kid I had heroes, from athletes, to musicians, to actors. I would dream about being a hero, being successful having everything I ever wanted in the world. From reading books of swashbuckling swordsmen, to winning a Stanley Cup, to singing in front of fifty thousand fans what else would anyone want in a hero. There are even times later in life that I would daydream about it. It seemed the world would be perfect if I could just be one of these superstars, it seemed like their lives were perfect. They seem to do everything right, the worked out, looked awesome, made money, got the girls etc.
Every so often i would hear about chinks in the armor. Finding out that the ripped athletes were taking drugs, professional wrestlers who were sworn enemies were actually best friends, and learning musicians were ‘taking drugs’ to write songs started to wear on me. One of my favorite heroes Bruce Lee smoked marijuana and was most likely hooked on cortisone and there was no way he could reach the body fat he was without it.
So if heroes aren’t what they seem to be maybe I should be looking at it in a different way. In the movie “A Bronx Tale” the dad shouts at C letting him know what real heroes are, stating the working man is the real hero. I saw his argument, but didn’t think he was one hundred percent complete.
Three months ago, I lost my wife, and I knew I had to hold it together, it took everything I knew to not completely freak out. What I found out that I had, or I should say we have a lot of good friends and family that stopped their world to be by my side. It was overwhelming, it was unbelievable, and still is ongoing. What took me three months to realize, I had been there for my friends in their darkest hours (and their brightest days) and will continue to try to be. My sister has been helping out in my house, and many of my friends have been doing anything I ask.
Today I went to visit someone in the hospital, a friend who i saw at Shiva, but had not seen in a long time before that. I didn’t think twice about trying to make some time during my crazy day to get there.
The notion of friendship, how to be a good friend, and to surround yourself with the right people. That is what is makes a hero. And its the ability to do the little things to make someones day, to help one another, In a book my father read to me Alexandre Dumas wrote “All for one, and one for all..” The three musketeers were one of my heroes, and to realize I have grown up to be like them, or at least to follow what they have found in each other. I have become one of my heroes, as well as my sister, many in my family, and most of my friends. We may not carry swords and fight a bad king, we fight for one another.
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